happyheartsstaff: (Default)
𝐻𝒜𝒫𝒫𝒴 𝐻𝐸𝒜𝑅𝒯𝒮 𝒮𝒯𝒜𝐹𝐹 ([personal profile] happyheartsstaff) wrote in [community profile] funnyhearts2020-04-22 10:38 am
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TEST DRIVE MEME 001 (#2)

HAPPY HEARTS HOTEL

You wake up in a padded box. It rocks, gently, as though suspended in mid-air. You begin to stir, confusion or distress pushing you to try to sit up — and then the air begins to smell sweet, and you fall back asleep.

You wake up in a padded box. For a moment, you are beatifically calm. You don't know how you got here, or why, but that isn't really all that important. You don't need to know where you are. You're just... here. And here is a wonderful place to be.

But there is a niggling suspicion growing in the back of your mind. A suspicion that here is not somewhere you wanted to be. That it is not where you're supposed to be. You remember... chasing a white rabbit (or was it a person)? A mirror? Bright light, and green ivy crawling over your skin... Before you can worry too much, the box jolts, and then settles, and after a long moment the walls fall from around you to reveal —

A hotel lobby?

"Welcome to the Happy Hearts Hotel and Casino," says an attendant behind a desk. "We're so pleased you could join us for our grand opening gala. We have your room keys and Empathies here, please make an orderly line and we'll hand them out once we've confirmed identities. After that, feel free to explore the hotel! We highly recommend starting with the casino. Everyone's a winner here in Happy Hearts!"

Is this normal? It doesn't feel normal. And hey — you could swear you had shoes before!

I. THE CASINO FLOOR



As you pass through the entrance to the casino floor, an attendant passes you a small bag of chips. The casino is loud and bright and filled with games of every kind — you want to play poker? They've got a table for that. Sabacc? There's a table for that, too. Slots, pachinko, and bingo are just a few of the other games on offer. The attendant in the lobby wasn't lying, either — everyone who plays wins. Everyone, every time.

Servers wander the floor with trays of shotglasses full of multi-coloured liquids, offering them to every Oyster "Compliments of Her Royal Highness." If you're expecting alcohol, though, you'll be surprised — these drinks are teas made of the distilled emotions of every Oyster in the hotel. Each colour of tea corresponds to a different emotion, and as soon as you take a sip, you feel overcome with that emotion.
JOY — the distilled essence of happiness, this tea makes even the most rough and tumble of Oysters giddy with happiness — for a moment. The effect fades into a general sense of contentment and affability after a few seconds, and that itself fades away slowly over the course of twenty minutes.

ANGER — this tea, anger in liquid form, can make the most even-tempered of Oysters ready to absolutely blow a gasket. For twenty minutes, anyone who drinks this tea will find themselves much more easily annoyed, frustrated, and all around irritable and snappy.

SADNESS — distilled sadness is a potent tea, capable of turning a stoic, stalwart Oyster into a blubbering mess in moments. Events that may have previously only been a minor disappointment become the end of the world, every repressed unhappiness comes to the fore, and for twenty minutes, any Oyster who drinks a sadness tea can hardly keep themselves together.


II. MAKING WAVES



If gambling isn't to your interest, there are many other areas of the hotel to explore! For the moment, only The Pool Of Tears and the Pig & Pepper Buffet are available for Oysters to peruse, but the staff assure anyone who asks that the other facilities will be open by the next day. Unfortunately, that means no one can buy any swimsuits from This Elegant Thimble, but the staff aren't going to kick anyone out of the pool for jumping in in their clothes!

There are four main attractions to The Pool of Tears: the pool, the jacuzzi, the wave pool, and the lazy river. The water is always just the right temperature, clean and clear and refreshing. It feels as if the sun shines down from above you, warm and comforting. Scattered through the pool area are clusters of modern lounge chairs, just waiting for someone to come relax in them. The Pool is, in a word, serene.

But not for long. The waves generated by the wave pool begin to get choppier, and larger, until it becomes clear that the generator itself is malfunctioning — too late, however, to avoid the tsunami that crashes through the whole Pool and leaves it flooded. Thankfully, no water escapes into the rest of the hotel, and the hotel staff work quickly to rescue those trapped in the Pool and drain the flooding — but you better hope you can tread water until they get to you!




III. EAT ME, DRINK ME



The Pig & Pepper buffet serves lunch foods from across all different cultures, offering something for everyone, and some things you've never even heard of.

On offer with these lunchtime dishes are cookies and biscuits and scones of all kinds, held on tiered trays with signs that proclaim Eat Me! in delightfully whimsical calligraphy. Nearby, hotel staff man a small booth for doling out cups of fruit waters from large pitchers, which have Drink Me! painted playfully on their sides.

It takes a while to feel the effects — perhaps you've even left the Pig & Pepper by the time it happens — but those who eat the cookies and scones inevitably end up growing in size, whether a few inches or feet, and those who drank the fruity water similarly shrink. Eat enough and you might strain the ceiling; drink enough and you'll be the size of a thimble! It's not permanent — if no one else can help you figure out how to get back to normal, the staff certainly will — but it's definitely inconvenient!




IV. WELCOME HOME



Maybe you just want to be alone — well, that's what you have your room key for! Oysters room on the second and third floors of the hotel, one to a room. You were assured your room would be exactly what you'd always wished for — and for some, that's right! It's exactly as you would have decorated it yourself. But for others, their rooms are totally wrong. A grizzled cowboy can't have a pink room! Hotel staff are firm, though: every room is exactly as its owner wants it to be. Search your feelings, Oyster. You know it to be true.

On each bed are the Oysters' personal effects, minus weapons, as well as a towel folded in the shape of a heart, and a single foil-wrapped chocolate. If eaten, the chocolate is delicious, and incites a feeling of tender warmth in Oysters — not lust, but a desire for closeness. Why spend time in your room, when you could go find a new friend in the casino?





Welcome to the (second!) first TDM of Happy Hearts, a new panfandom roleplaying game here on DW! If you have any questions, please direct them to the first comment on this page. Happy playing, Oysters!




© tessisamess


lunchbreaks: (hurts to remember all the good times)

[personal profile] lunchbreaks 2020-04-23 11:02 pm (UTC)(link)
Well, I was just thinking, I've had an awful day. So I was looking for a drink, and there was a waiter with all this punch! And I thought, lovely, that's exactly what I need.

And the next thing I know, I'm... short!

[ He seems so upset about this in a very classic, over-the-top Aziraphale way. ]

They should really put a warning on those!

[ He takes no personal responsibility for this happening. ]
lunchbreaks: (another starry night like this)

Re: Eat Me, Drink Me

[personal profile] lunchbreaks 2020-04-23 11:03 pm (UTC)(link)
[ He does climb onto the proffered hand, gratefully. ]

Oh, thank you. And I do think that if we don't complain, they won't know where to draw the line. Surely it's worth trying!

Have they done anything to you?

[personal profile] grudged 2020-04-23 11:10 pm (UTC)(link)
Lucifer was cast out of Heaven by God's hand, so the story goes.

But if one doesn't believe in God, it stands to reason they don't believe in his counterpart either.

Still, I am curious...

Was he really so beautiful? Was God really so jealous? Or was that embellished, as well?

[personal profile] grudged 2020-04-23 11:11 pm (UTC)(link)
Enemies are not always obvious. Sometimes, they can hide in plain sight.

What then? Would you cut an innocent person down, if you knew that someday they would come to oppose you?
flouts: (pic#13938960)

[personal profile] flouts 2020-04-23 11:16 pm (UTC)(link)
buddy... pal...... this is a really heavy line of questioning for a seventeen year old to consider.....

Until they do something wrong, it wouldn't be right to hurt them

Pre-emptive justice isn't justice, it's just fear
lunchbreaks: (since i don't know when)

[personal profile] lunchbreaks 2020-04-23 11:17 pm (UTC)(link)
Aziraphale feels the relief as well, to see a familiar face, to know that it was the person who he'd gone to the ends of the Earth with and come back unscathed. "Good-- good, if you're feeling up to it we should figure out how to--"

"Oh, are there oysters?" he asks, perking up, clearly having missed something in the brief.
song_princess: (Hearts)

[personal profile] song_princess 2020-04-23 11:22 pm (UTC)(link)
Awesome, thank you for your quick response!
crystallomancy: (075)

[personal profile] crystallomancy 2020-04-23 11:30 pm (UTC)(link)
This is terrible. Thank you, I'm really, really sorry.

[personal profile] grudged 2020-04-23 11:32 pm (UTC)(link)
[Indeed. Behold this three year age difference, insurmountable and vast.

So step up, son, your morals ain't shit.]


An honorable way to live.

Bravo.

Let us hope nothing in your life should ever come to challenge such upstanding values.

[personal profile] grudged 2020-04-23 11:36 pm (UTC)(link)
[Uh-huh. Guess who just failed that dice roll.]

I've already been sent on a scavenger hunt for questionable goods, so I guess one more item wouldn't hurt.

I'll hunt down a copy for you.

I think you'll find it enlightening.


[...somebody really likes their gory action shlock, apparently. Reservoir Dogs truly is an enduring title for the ages.]
flouts: (pic#13938994)

[personal profile] flouts 2020-04-23 11:38 pm (UTC)(link)
just cuz you couldn't manage it doesn't mean he can't, old man!!!

and don't worry, he'll come upon his own moral quandaries soon enough.


If you killed everyone who might do something wrong someday, no one would be left! The point of weapons and abilities like your metal man is to protect people, not terrify them into submission!
crystallomancy: (012)

natsume sakasaki ☆ ensemble stars!

[personal profile] crystallomancy 2020-04-23 11:41 pm (UTC)(link)
( we don't give out participation prizes here )
[ winning every time has to get boring for people other than just him, right.

that's why he's set up his own little game, just out of sight of the staff running theirs; there are three cups handily procured from the buffet, along with one of those chips everyone's got on hand. If anyone gives him a look, he holds it up and smiles a little. ]


Would you like to play a GAME? I promise that you won't regret IT. The prize is something only a magician could manAGE.

[ he puts a strange emphasis on the end of his sentences - their syllables - and he has a reason for it!! just don't ask him because i don't want to deal with his chuunibyou bullshit ]


( spill it, girl )
[ natsume is, at heart, A Chemist. well, he's a magician, but he enjoys sorcery and alchemy and all of that good good stuff. it's only natural that, after sampling each tea, he'd consider trying to make some interesting mixtures.

you can catch him when he's feeling the effects of his sampling, or you could be unlucky enough to be called out to with a gentle: ]
Fancy having a DRINK?

[ don't take it you'll just bounce between whatever emotions are in it and get an awful headache. ]


( otome route )
[ well - at least he gets his own room that he absolutely 110% doesn't have to share with anyone, least of all some extremely loud, gremlin-like senior. not that sir knight is completely terrible..... after all, he's traveling most of the time. the room at ensemble square may as well just be his in general.

the room here looks like something out of an earth witch aesthetic blog. there's racks for drying herbs, bookshelves, a nice desk, mortar and pestle... candles. the ceiling is painted with constellations, and the lighting is a warm, cozy dimness; the bed has a lot of pillows on it, which is not exactly what he'd really dig, but it's fine. why is all of this so easy to see? ...he's leaning in his doorway, playing with the foil his chocolate'd been in. hmm. hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm.

if you don't catch him there, he's probably going to find you via knocking on your door, so! let's get this bread. ]


( wildcard )
[ anything else that doesn't have to deal with the prompts above. i'm generally flexible! ]
Edited 2020-04-23 23:42 (UTC)

[personal profile] grudged 2020-04-23 11:42 pm (UTC)(link)
Heh.

Cute.


[!!!]
flouts: (pic#13938966)

[personal profile] flouts 2020-04-23 11:45 pm (UTC)(link)
who are you calling cute!!! where is his brother, where is lan zhan, he wants to yell so much

There's nothing cute about justice!

[personal profile] grudged 2020-04-23 11:50 pm (UTC)(link)
Generally, no. It's a lot bloodier than most tend to presume.

But what else should I call someone acting childishly?

You are still a child, aren't you?
flouts: (seventh.)

[personal profile] flouts 2020-04-23 11:54 pm (UTC)(link)
It's not childish to want to do the right thing. You think "they might have hurt someone some day" is a good excuse for hurting innocent people? That's just what people tell themselves so they don't have to contend with the immorality of their actions.
inlovewithmycar: (Got the whole world in his hands)

[personal profile] inlovewithmycar 2020-04-23 11:59 pm (UTC)(link)
"So we poke around in the employees only areas. Sounds good."

He misses his little working jacket. He misses his lanyards with identification. He'd barely been here two hours and he misses just being able to pass as human.

He's itching to rifle through some filing cabinets. And maybe gumming up upper-management's coffee maker.

Crowley isn't very good at the whole 'evil' thing.

"C'mon, let's get a good vantage point and see who's giving orders and where they go for breaks."

[personal profile] grudged 2020-04-24 12:13 am (UTC)(link)
You didn't answer my question.
inlovewithmycar: (Bargaining)

[personal profile] inlovewithmycar 2020-04-24 12:14 am (UTC)(link)
"We're the oysters, angel. Like the poem."

Crowley sneered. He was far from Dodgson's biggest fan; the man had mad the skin on his back crawl. But the man had a way with poems, and it was terribly hard for Crowley to resist a few good verses.

"The time has come to talk of many things. Of shoes and ships and sealing wax, of cabbages and kings."

He gave Aziraphale a pleading look, hoping the angel would get his mind off oysters and realize the sinister undertones of what their new markings mean.

"You know, take us through the casino on a jolly little venture, get us nice and complacent and then - I don't know. Probably eat us. Grind us up like in Soyl- like in Make Room! Make Room!."

Crowley had to remind himself Aziraphale would probably be more familiar with the book than the film adaptation.
inlovewithmycar: (very drunk)

[personal profile] inlovewithmycar 2020-04-24 12:22 am (UTC)(link)
[ Don't pick him up and put him on your shoulder, Crowley mentally repeats in his head, expression gone a bit glazed. Eventually he snaps himself back to reality. ]

You have lost a few inches, I'll give you that. They don't just have, I don't know, another drink that'll fix it? Any growing cookies?

[ He pauses, remembering where they are. ]

...Or was it cakes for growing?
inlovewithmycar: (Default)

Text

[personal profile] inlovewithmycar 2020-04-24 12:25 am (UTC)(link)
Under. I'm not a complete monster.
sixrealmsofhell: (Default)

[personal profile] sixrealmsofhell 2020-04-24 12:26 am (UTC)(link)
I wouldn't recommend drinking the tea unless you like mood swings.

[He pushes the button for the lobby with his free hand as he steps into the elevator]
lunchbreaks: (if you change your mind)

[personal profile] lunchbreaks 2020-04-24 12:28 am (UTC)(link)
"Yes, yes, I know that poem," he says, "are you saying we're the oysters?" he asks, looking horrified. That does make sense, they are trying to lure them in with money that they seemingly just keep winning, and they have clipped his and Crowley's wings.

"Well. I've tried the exit... I suppose we'll just have to. Break a window."

He looks at Crowley with a sort of desperate, pleading look like he wasn't sure what they could do, because none of this was making any sense. And if humans were behind this, why would they want to eat the two of them? Surely, they wouldn't taste very good!