[ Lan Wangji looks at him with wide eyes. Oh, wow, yes, that was definitely a deviation.
He searches Wei Ying's face for any signs of teasing. If he found out, it must mean they kissed a second time. That means-- Oh.
It means the other him is braver, that's what that means.
It means somehow his heart is full with love and wonder, and yet, feels like it's been shot through with arrows, ripped out, stomped on. To know how this one feels, but not to know if the one at home is the same in this regard. To love the man who sits before him, but to know that both of them belong to others who happen to also, somehow, be themselves. To feel like he should have been more brazen, as a young man, growing out of his boyhood, unable to understand or process his feelings. To have been bolder after that, to stand by Wei Ying and tell everyone else that they were the ones who were wrong.
He will not betray the other one and explain to Wei Ying what exactly his gestures mean.
He closes his eyes and the emotion is gone from his face. ]
Are you happy?
[ And he does mean Wei Ying. He can extrapolate how the other him feels. ]
no subject
He searches Wei Ying's face for any signs of teasing. If he found out, it must mean they kissed a second time. That means-- Oh.
It means the other him is braver, that's what that means.
It means somehow his heart is full with love and wonder, and yet, feels like it's been shot through with arrows, ripped out, stomped on. To know how this one feels, but not to know if the one at home is the same in this regard. To love the man who sits before him, but to know that both of them belong to others who happen to also, somehow, be themselves. To feel like he should have been more brazen, as a young man, growing out of his boyhood, unable to understand or process his feelings. To have been bolder after that, to stand by Wei Ying and tell everyone else that they were the ones who were wrong.
He will not betray the other one and explain to Wei Ying what exactly his gestures mean.
He closes his eyes and the emotion is gone from his face. ]
Are you happy?
[ And he does mean Wei Ying. He can extrapolate how the other him feels. ]