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funnyhearts2020-04-22 10:38 am
happyheartsstaff) wrote in funnyhearts2020-04-22 10:38 am
Entry tags:
TEST DRIVE MEME 001 (#2)
HAPPY HEARTS HOTEL
You wake up in a padded box. It rocks, gently, as though suspended in mid-air. You begin to stir, confusion or distress pushing you to try to sit up — and then the air begins to smell sweet, and you fall back asleep.You wake up in a padded box. For a moment, you are beatifically calm. You don't know how you got here, or why, but that isn't really all that important. You don't need to know where you are. You're just... here. And here is a wonderful place to be.
But there is a niggling suspicion growing in the back of your mind. A suspicion that here is not somewhere you wanted to be. That it is not where you're supposed to be. You remember... chasing a white rabbit (or was it a person)? A mirror? Bright light, and green ivy crawling over your skin... Before you can worry too much, the box jolts, and then settles, and after a long moment the walls fall from around you to reveal —
A hotel lobby?
"Welcome to the Happy Hearts Hotel and Casino," says an attendant behind a desk. "We're so pleased you could join us for our grand opening gala. We have your room keys and Empathies here, please make an orderly line and we'll hand them out once we've confirmed identities. After that, feel free to explore the hotel! We highly recommend starting with the casino. Everyone's a winner here in Happy Hearts!"
Is this normal? It doesn't feel normal. And hey — you could swear you had shoes before!
I. THE CASINO FLOOR
As you pass through the entrance to the casino floor, an attendant passes you a small bag of chips. The casino is loud and bright and filled with games of every kind — you want to play poker? They've got a table for that. Sabacc? There's a table for that, too. Slots, pachinko, and bingo are just a few of the other games on offer. The attendant in the lobby wasn't lying, either — everyone who plays wins. Everyone, every time.
Servers wander the floor with trays of shotglasses full of multi-coloured liquids, offering them to every Oyster "Compliments of Her Royal Highness." If you're expecting alcohol, though, you'll be surprised — these drinks are teas made of the distilled emotions of every Oyster in the hotel. Each colour of tea corresponds to a different emotion, and as soon as you take a sip, you feel overcome with that emotion.
Servers wander the floor with trays of shotglasses full of multi-coloured liquids, offering them to every Oyster "Compliments of Her Royal Highness." If you're expecting alcohol, though, you'll be surprised — these drinks are teas made of the distilled emotions of every Oyster in the hotel. Each colour of tea corresponds to a different emotion, and as soon as you take a sip, you feel overcome with that emotion.
JOY — the distilled essence of happiness, this tea makes even the most rough and tumble of Oysters giddy with happiness — for a moment. The effect fades into a general sense of contentment and affability after a few seconds, and that itself fades away slowly over the course of twenty minutes.
ANGER — this tea, anger in liquid form, can make the most even-tempered of Oysters ready to absolutely blow a gasket. For twenty minutes, anyone who drinks this tea will find themselves much more easily annoyed, frustrated, and all around irritable and snappy.
SADNESS — distilled sadness is a potent tea, capable of turning a stoic, stalwart Oyster into a blubbering mess in moments. Events that may have previously only been a minor disappointment become the end of the world, every repressed unhappiness comes to the fore, and for twenty minutes, any Oyster who drinks a sadness tea can hardly keep themselves together.
II. MAKING WAVES
If gambling isn't to your interest, there are many other areas of the hotel to explore! For the moment, only The Pool Of Tears and the Pig & Pepper Buffet are available for Oysters to peruse, but the staff assure anyone who asks that the other facilities will be open by the next day. Unfortunately, that means no one can buy any swimsuits from This Elegant Thimble, but the staff aren't going to kick anyone out of the pool for jumping in in their clothes!
There are four main attractions to The Pool of Tears: the pool, the jacuzzi, the wave pool, and the lazy river. The water is always just the right temperature, clean and clear and refreshing. It feels as if the sun shines down from above you, warm and comforting. Scattered through the pool area are clusters of modern lounge chairs, just waiting for someone to come relax in them. The Pool is, in a word, serene.
But not for long. The waves generated by the wave pool begin to get choppier, and larger, until it becomes clear that the generator itself is malfunctioning — too late, however, to avoid the tsunami that crashes through the whole Pool and leaves it flooded. Thankfully, no water escapes into the rest of the hotel, and the hotel staff work quickly to rescue those trapped in the Pool and drain the flooding — but you better hope you can tread water until they get to you!
There are four main attractions to The Pool of Tears: the pool, the jacuzzi, the wave pool, and the lazy river. The water is always just the right temperature, clean and clear and refreshing. It feels as if the sun shines down from above you, warm and comforting. Scattered through the pool area are clusters of modern lounge chairs, just waiting for someone to come relax in them. The Pool is, in a word, serene.
But not for long. The waves generated by the wave pool begin to get choppier, and larger, until it becomes clear that the generator itself is malfunctioning — too late, however, to avoid the tsunami that crashes through the whole Pool and leaves it flooded. Thankfully, no water escapes into the rest of the hotel, and the hotel staff work quickly to rescue those trapped in the Pool and drain the flooding — but you better hope you can tread water until they get to you!
III. EAT ME, DRINK ME
The Pig & Pepper buffet serves lunch foods from across all different cultures, offering something for everyone, and some things you've never even heard of.
On offer with these lunchtime dishes are cookies and biscuits and scones of all kinds, held on tiered trays with signs that proclaim Eat Me! in delightfully whimsical calligraphy. Nearby, hotel staff man a small booth for doling out cups of fruit waters from large pitchers, which have Drink Me! painted playfully on their sides.
It takes a while to feel the effects — perhaps you've even left the Pig & Pepper by the time it happens — but those who eat the cookies and scones inevitably end up growing in size, whether a few inches or feet, and those who drank the fruity water similarly shrink. Eat enough and you might strain the ceiling; drink enough and you'll be the size of a thimble! It's not permanent — if no one else can help you figure out how to get back to normal, the staff certainly will — but it's definitely inconvenient!
On offer with these lunchtime dishes are cookies and biscuits and scones of all kinds, held on tiered trays with signs that proclaim Eat Me! in delightfully whimsical calligraphy. Nearby, hotel staff man a small booth for doling out cups of fruit waters from large pitchers, which have Drink Me! painted playfully on their sides.
It takes a while to feel the effects — perhaps you've even left the Pig & Pepper by the time it happens — but those who eat the cookies and scones inevitably end up growing in size, whether a few inches or feet, and those who drank the fruity water similarly shrink. Eat enough and you might strain the ceiling; drink enough and you'll be the size of a thimble! It's not permanent — if no one else can help you figure out how to get back to normal, the staff certainly will — but it's definitely inconvenient!
IV. WELCOME HOME
Maybe you just want to be alone — well, that's what you have your room key for! Oysters room on the second and third floors of the hotel, one to a room. You were assured your room would be exactly what you'd always wished for — and for some, that's right! It's exactly as you would have decorated it yourself. But for others, their rooms are totally wrong. A grizzled cowboy can't have a pink room! Hotel staff are firm, though: every room is exactly as its owner wants it to be. Search your feelings, Oyster. You know it to be true.
On each bed are the Oysters' personal effects, minus weapons, as well as a towel folded in the shape of a heart, and a single foil-wrapped chocolate. If eaten, the chocolate is delicious, and incites a feeling of tender warmth in Oysters — not lust, but a desire for closeness. Why spend time in your room, when you could go find a new friend in the casino?
On each bed are the Oysters' personal effects, minus weapons, as well as a towel folded in the shape of a heart, and a single foil-wrapped chocolate. If eaten, the chocolate is delicious, and incites a feeling of tender warmth in Oysters — not lust, but a desire for closeness. Why spend time in your room, when you could go find a new friend in the casino?
Welcome to the (second!) first TDM of Happy Hearts, a new panfandom roleplaying game here on DW! If you have any questions, please direct them to the first comment on this page. Happy playing, Oysters!
ยฉ tessisamess
crying at "tough nipples" in my inbox, thanks :')
Usually I relegate these responsibilities to my staff.
But I'm a one man operation, at least for now, so I'll have to make do.
Good to meet you, Dr. O'Hara.
Science is a broad field. What do you study?
WHOOPS WRONG ACCOUNT sorry my dude
Miguel or Migโs fine. โDoctorโ tends to give people the wrong impression.
Iโm a geneticist.
I was clearly too excited for nipples, forgive my double tag
Hm... that's quite interesting, actually.
I'll understand if you refuse; I'm not easily offended.
Bearing that in mind, are you up for a difficult question?
it's understandable tbh
Only if you're prepared for a difficult answer. [ presumably. ]
no subject
[...interesting because of a question like that, quite possibly.]
no subject
right.
yeah, that's interesting.
there's a long answer and a short answer to that: the long answer is that it's complicated. the short answer is—
—still that it's complicated. ]
Depends on your definition. I think humans can evolve, but change isn't always progress. In evolution itself, that doesn't mean that any given species will evolve to best suit its own survival — overspecialization, coevolution. Both can lead to extinction, for example.
[ which isn't even touching on the question of mutants or inhumans. ]
Strictly speaking? I think it's possible but I don't think it's an inevitability.
What do you define as 'better'?
no subject
[There's a short delay before several more messages follow, all rapid fire.]
A famous figure in my world once theorized that people could change, if exposed to difficult circumstances. Adaptive evolution, but over decades as opposed to thousands of years.
People evolved not to survive, but to understand each other. To grow past the need for petty bloodshed and struggle. This man believed in the power of possibility that lies within the human heart, yet was ironically struck down himself for his theories.
I wonder if it's as you say. A question of morality, or "Just because you can, doesn't mean you should."
As for what I think, I don't really know.
Maybe something like that, so nebulous and uncertain, was not meant for us to decide.
no subject
[ is all he sends at first: the rest of it raises questions he hasn't had to really think about in a while — working for alchemax at home, under tyler, had been very different to working for tiberius in 2014, had been very different to working for parker. thoughts of genetics, imprinting, the corporate raider program, all of it — morally, ethically, functionally — had taken a back seat. ]
My brother would agree with you.
I'd be out of a job if someone, somewhere, didn't think we had a shot at it.
no subject
Well, the work you do is important. I would be the last person to deny that.
You will continue to be challenged all your life, for your philosophy and for your profession.
But I'm guessing you knew that already.
no subject
Don't worry, I've got people close at hand for whenever I'm beginning to feel complacent.
[ "yes." ]
no subject
[Y'know, just taking a shot in the dark here.]
no subject
She'd be flattered.
Might even be true, in a non-traditional sense.
no subject
Is "non-traditional" what you prefer?
no subject
What?
[ (—but really.) ]
Jesus.
I don't think that shocking matters.
no subject
But it's important to surround yourself with those you trust.
Or at least those you can count on to act, or react, when it matters most.
no subject
Yeah? And how are we going to establish that? I'm allergic to trust exercises.
no subject
Arm wrestling in zero-G is always a good time for everyone.
...although it can get a little out of hand, sometimes.
no subject
no subject
How do you choose to relax? If not among the stars, then by some other means, surely.
no subject
(nah, probably not the answer.) ]
Or with arm wrestling. Macho posturing isn't really my thing.
[ is what he sends first, before following it up — at length — with: ] Movies. Restaurants. Dates. You know, the usual.
[ hashtag nailed it, right. ]
no subject
Nor mine. But that's the cost of commanding a military operation, I suppose. You're really just a glorified babysitter.
Have you heard of a man by the name of Tarantino? He's still quite popular in my time.
I have to wonder about some of his tastes, though...
[#relatable #itwasntafootfetish #ITWASANARTISTICCHOICE]
no subject
[ punctuated by the longest pause, because miguel is a guy that has absolutely no familiarity with the wizard of oz but has somehow managed to watch the fly. ]
Sure. [ no. ] He's the guy with the movie about ... the mob, or something, right?
no subject
I've already been sent on a scavenger hunt for questionable goods, so I guess one more item wouldn't hurt.
I'll hunt down a copy for you.
I think you'll find it enlightening.
[...somebody really likes their gory action shlock, apparently. Reservoir Dogs truly is an enduring title for the ages.]
no subject
You think this place has access to twencen media?
[ exhibit a: one adult human male, doubtful. ]
But thanks. Don't forget the flowers though.